if you don't like something, change it.
if you can't change it, change your attitude.
mardi 30 juin 2009 00:58
HAPPY BIRTHDAY VIVIANA FEQUIRA OO! hope you enjoyed your day and NO i was not bored seriously.
i really enjoyed my day, birthday girl, so no worries. such coincidence to have celebrated the birthday of a fellow cancerian with two other cancerians! what a small world huh?
anyway, we caught the 9.30pm show for DRAG ME TO HELL, the horror comedy, at cineleisure, theatre 10.
but half the show was kind of ruined by this dude who sat in front of us, at seat E9. seriously man, it's a horror comedy and some kind of a naive shit you are to take the show so seriously as a thriller.
was having a great time laughing at the dumb moments of the show and this particular guy jsut simply had to stare at us with his "bionic" eyes as though we were the ones ruining the show for him. i hope he drowned in embarrassment when the ENTIRE theatre audience laughed at another dumb scene, which was also FUNNY.
sighs, there goes another weird singaporean for you.
but nonetheless, it was a great day and it sparks the start of July, the cancerian month. :D
i got this message from some unknown dude on facebook, titled Opportunity.
Hi would u like to join us in our business. Untuk kaum Melayu Singapura sahaja. We will guide you to make up to $20,000 per month. Kalau interested, sms nama and umur to :
96486664
No experience needed. The more the merrier. Only for Malay Singaporeans
Regards The Wizard
i never knew i looked like a malay! this is so interesting. it's a new and refreshing comment for me. lmaos.
anyways, i found a new job! will be tutoring two kids starting next week. three hours in total per session for both boys, three times a week, at $500 per month. i am so going to make them fail miserably. HAHA!
alright, of course not. i shall read up more on my primary school education and hopefully be a good tutor. shall find more time to update you guys then.
in six months and five days this blog will turn two years old.
scary how time flies by and struck you in surprise. over the past one year, no doubt the way i blogged my posts have changed.
i believe, from childish and nonsensical, to controversial (at times), crazy and mad (all the time) and most of all, more matured and sensible (which explains the few emo-screamo posts and hiatuses).
from the "liaos, lahs, lehs, lohs and huhs, and sobsobs and =.=" in nearly every sentence, to the more civilized and pleasant posts. from disgustingly tiny fonts, to disturbingly large and emphasized letters.
but one thing has not changed one bit, my stubborn and shameless need for friendship.
everyday someone tells you that, people come and go, friends can be made and forgotten. but i never believed so, or in the sense, i always lived in a fear of losing my friends, any friend that is.
when i was really young, i knew this boy. His name was Paul Sim Yong Qiang. Skinny boy at sight, funny and an entertainer at heart, always the more sensible one between us. All the other kids loved him, and he was no doubt, wittingly a people's person.
i would call him every night and we would chat the evenings away even though we hung out all the time in school. on every alternate week, we would while afternoons away at either of our houses. like brothers, we shared all our secrets among ourselves, and was always siding each other when trouble calls.
and yet, a friendship as strong and indispensable as this, was fragile and easily put behind when we went separate paths and moved on in life. so then i got sick of always keeping track with the whatever and whenever in his life, and his lack of initiation.
five, six years down the road, i spent everyday living in fear, of losing another friend, and seeing to the importance of ensuring a good friendship every time i met someone nice.
till today, i regret for giving up on preserving our friendship. because, today may be the last day you tell your friend that he or she was the greatest person who ever came into your life. and because tomorrow he or she may disappear like they were never there.
if i were to metamorphose my compunctions for this forsaken friendship, i would say that it's a burn scar that covers my entire skin, marking the regret for life in the most significant way.
so my friends, do accept my apology, for i feel a great deal of vindication for being so busy and ever more busier, as we grow old. but do know that no matter how much i change, deep down in my heart, i value each and every single one of you, for all of you makes me who i am today.
i love each and every one of my friends and i thank you all for being there all my life.
and for those who couldn't find your face in the picture, don't bother cause we have never taken a photo together anyway! lmao. but whether or not your face is in it, so long as you see me as a friend, do know that you are well-valued.
because i do too. (:
i especially love the fact that as each day goes by, our friendship grows older by a day.
the heatwave a hatewave. temperatures reported to be possibly going up to a thirty five degree this week.
first day of the holidays and i thought i could somehow enjoy the summer heat down by the pool, but instead the clouds decided to haunt the skies instead.
how very unlucky. and now i got ditched without a partner for a project. oh dear oh dear. what do i do.
in the day the weather was so nice and windy that my day by the pool was ruined.
in the night the weather is so hot and sizzling that my night at home was spent sweating it out. and now i am in woes of looking for a project partner. such luck.
i can't wait to get out of poly, because somehow everyone is just looking out for their own asses. it's like the working world, just more cruel.
maybe i should start looking out for myself as well, and not just naively think that i have people whom i can safely trust and rely on.
shut up and put your money where your mouth is! now that's what i will tell to the rich kids the next time they try to be a snub. my secret fetish for jazz has been more obvious lately, from Amy Winehouse to Duffy to Olivia Ong to Joanna Wong and to zhis zhis zhis and to zhat zhat zhat.
non-stop on the bus, non-stop back at home.
i need to feel more carefree. and be more carefree as well.
sometimes i jsut feel as though i have been stuck on this treadmill for a really long time, without a goal, without a destination point. i have been running, just running. i have not stopped once in my tracks to take in the beautiful things around me.
and every now and then, i thiink back and reminisce in the moment that i missed, the things that i have overlooked while i ran and let them whizz past me.
i have been really proud of myself, for i have entered two common tests fully prepared and ready to take on the questions. for i have exited two common tests early and with a blooming glow of confidence in myself.
then again, i faked mc for another paper. it's kind of a sin, but then again, i really wanted to focus on the other two papers so much that i overlooked this last paper. taking the mc was really kind of a cowardly act, but who wouldn't think smartly when it comes to getting good grades? if taking an mc allows me more time to prepare myself for an even harder paper, i wouldn't mind. at least i would be able to enter the examination hall feeling more accomplished and upright to myself.
yeah, excuses but i don't care. yeah, life is short, so i wouldn't want to spend a single minute feeling sad over a nonsensical piece of paper and it's red throbbing grade. anything upsetting is ridiculous and a waste of time. so to minimise the chances of that happening, i would have to make sure i put in more effort and embrace the great stuff.
studying hard. is this even me? shocking, but yeah. this is me.
anyways, sinceNICOLE LIMjust reminded me, so i shall talk about this then.
how does one judge how close friends really are to each other?
i am not sure about you people out there, but for myself, i judge it close when i decide to disclose secrets, and indulge in heart-to-heart conversations at times.
in a way, that's how i tell these people that i value them as close friends. you may not know my favourite food, my favourite hang-outs, but if you do know a secret or two of mine, you are a close friend.
and in a way, when these people choose not to let me know about their issues, be it woes or happiness, i take it that you do not value the closeness of the friendship.
i understand how some people choose not to talk about problems, as it just makes them sad when they talk about it. but i don't understand how one could not share the joy of being in a relationship. as to having me find out on my own, or to hear it from someone else, i guess it jsut puts me off.
during work i was upset, not just because i was sick, but because you chose to change the topic. maybe we really aren't that close after all.
i don't know if you really do make people feel as though you have fallen for them, but you do make people feel that you value close friends. in which, for the first time in my life, my intuition failed me.
enough about things not worth my time. back to the more important things to do.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY EDWIN HUANG BAO BAO!
seriously cant wait for this sunday where i can meet my beloved bunch of ex-ex-colleagues and HAVE FUN! :)
it's the attack of the red hot chili pepper lips! and they are here to stay!
jiesi you must eat more. so skinny! so malnourished. aiyoh. must take care ah. AHAHHA! mummy toh will love me for helping you eat right. right?
lately, the goosebumps on my goosebumps grew legs and ran away cause jiesi and her dog got too mushy washy and more mushy. hahhaa! there, i finally blogged what i wanted to blog.
i can't wait for common tests to end and the twoo short weeks of holidays will be here! and then i can meet up with thm and ccy and go clubbing with jiesi as well! my virgin clubbing experience will be bestowed upon the holy jiesiness. so eggciting.
NOOOOOOODERR! it's the new in word for being happy and excited and stupid mixed together. credits to our dear THM.
tayhuimin is now on her way to becoming an avid camwhore.
chewchenyaan is now on her way to showing off her really pretty smiles and lovely teeth with confidence.
i am so happy we met up today. (ccy you are dumb for not moving in closer! this picture damn nice lohhhhh! nooooder!)
i miss them all, really.
on certain nights, i while away cuddled in bed, thinking of how i would not be putting on my uniform and going to school to spend another day filled with happiness in that same classroom.
nearly three years down the road, it still amazes me how we all came together as one, how strangers wound up as friends whom i regard as my family. how an indispensable friendship bloomed along the way.
morning assemblies will never be the same, refreshing and rid of all mundane.
classes will never be the same, filled with endless laughter and the sound of poker cards being shuffled flipping away.
although we are each and all busy in our own ways, every time we meet up, i never feel a barrier. it's so ludicrous that sometimes i really have to pinch myself in my cheek to make sure its all not but a dream.
was sneezing non-stop at work today and totally listless. was sick to the extent i didn't even know what i was saying to the customers.
feeling a fever coming on later. this is so ridiculous. my body is giving up on me when i have not even given up yet. been so busy lately that i spent the past two weeks sleeping for four hours a day. though sometimes i have myself to blame when i had one or two days to head home and really rest but didn't and went out instead. then again, i don't really want to feel like i am living some lifeless life.
i was on my way back home from work and fell asleep on the bus. i dreamt that my parents used my phone to send smses to my friends regarding my death of over exhaustion. ridiculous dream, yet feasible at the rate that i am going.
i can't wait for the holidays to come. but before that, i have to make sure i pass all my common tests. so my dear body. please please please recover by tonight.
stress stress stress stress stressed.
anywaycredits to cassandra lee mei xian the ASS for showing me this video.
